Author name: Hayden Veil

In an earlier incarnation, Hayden Veil enjoyed a successful career in software engineering, writing late-night poetry in pursuit of sanity. On 2 February 2020, the world of Hayden Veil changed: Ghosts became real and with its soul laid bare there was no turning back from the perpetual path of poetry.

C90

Music must have a powerful impact on a child, I suggest as I sing along to every word I hear. Dire Straits played in the car; a travelling family of one among four. Back then on cassettes; C90, with automation and jamming tapes. I remember every word sung; none of the words spoken, between the seats of an orange car of German make. I still recall the silence; the moment the music ended.

Trust me (k)not,

This day,

A noose dangling,

Loosely from a ceiling,

There are shades,

Shadeless shames,

Hanging over me,

timeless clocks ticking,

And roads not yet travelled.

Tray.

Trade.

Traitor.

May.

I kick the bucket,

And the noose tighten,

m.a.y

May – in days of old meant

Spring in bloom,

May – forever now be

Hell’s fires rising high,

May May be forgotten

Buried; and tarmaced,

A slaughterhouse alight

With clowns laughing

turn me on

I did not mind you forgetting my 40th,

You were busy making a “new life”,

I never minded the one you presented,

Years earlier; I recall our hotel room,

You asked why I hadn’t come,

I blamed the pills; but looking back,

Maybe you didn’t get me,

Maybe you didn’t; turn me on

The last remaining pot now harbours flies, smaller than my favourite: the fruit-fly, equally annoying yet comforting to keep; …, skinny-diving into unprotected glasses, akin to the lunchtime dung-fly stuck in the latte, I do tell them off; loudly, which matters not the slightest, we mingle in the shared space, in silence

Note to self: well done to identify that the purpose of face-to-face tutorials is to make you realise that you need to study harder. Further to that insight, I hope you now realise the purpose of day-schools is to question your choice of subject. Yes, a bottle of wine might muddle the boundary between reality and the fantasy world you have created, but remember: … uhm … next time; buy two bottles … you will need it as you contemplate your choices :I

May I Question Your Sincerity

You speak the parlance of the fool,

I see Satan sitting firmly on both

Your shoulders,

I have no right per se,

To state; anything,

Yet I find myself unable,

To shut my gob,

To not care,

About my life,

Here.

note to self: I know how much you hate reviewing the assignment feedback. But you know what, the act of procrastination does make it worse and it does expend more energy (of which you have little left). Forget #brexit for a while and sort out your studies, after that you can turn to those brown envelopes from the tax man … In the end it might make a difference :I

Me: but you don’t believe in Hell

You: schadenfreude

Me: huh?

You: le EU, oui: we will persist; le UK: c’EST fire fire pants on liar, n’EST pa?

Me: *walks off to a dark corner of the universe* masturbating without arms is hard

Universe: *explodes*

Scroll to Top